The world according to brunettes : twelve american movies I would consider as the worst I have ever seen
Submitted by cramoukji on Tue, 02/22/2005 - 12:54
Tags:
- The Astronaut's wife (an idea that would have been gripping in a twenty-minute Twilight Zone episode could never make for a gripping 90-minute movie especially when it's obvious the actors don't believe in their parts and the ending is nothing more than a blatant rip-off )Spoiler: Highlight to viewfrom Croneberg's Scanners when the "good" scanner saves himself from death with a mind/body switch with his "evil" brother
- Baby geniuses (let them geniuses spell it themselves: this movie is s-t-u-p-i-d)
- Battlefield Earth (I simply couldn't watch this reverse-effect scientology propaganda in its entirety)
- The Cat in the Hat (and even more proof that Mike Myers has grown old to become a pompous conceited over-the-hill bore)
- Footloose (bad acting, bad soundtrack, bad directing and cinematography and of course the worst premise ever for a teenage movie)
- Fort Apache The Bronx (I think this was supposed to be realistic... the same way a right-wing white suprematist fascist comic-book would be, I guess)
- Freeway (and this, they say, is black humor, my friend... and this, I say, has made me wonder who was responsible because someone has to take the blame for this crap)
- Godzilla (think about how many starving african populations could have been relieved with the money blown on this megaturd)
- Practical witchcraft (I hate it for a million reasons and especially because it doesn't deliver anything it should have, story-wise and acting-wise)
- Signs (this movie is about aliens and what the human reactions to them would be and yet its real message is somehow to prove that God really does exist... 'Nuff said)
- Wild Wild West (aww, come on, do I really need to explain ?)
- The World according to Garp (this story is of another time and already was when the movie came out... I would like to give a mention to John Lithgow but even he does not make the most of his role)
Author Comments:
Of course there are million other bad movies but these few listed here are especially deserving of my contempt because they had good, if not high, budgets and fair, if not stellar, castings, sometimes even capable, if not virtuous, directors and yet they didn't deliver anything except bad clichés, a lack of effort, some disgust and utter boredom.
I have only seen 2 of these, fortunately: Godzilla and Wild Wild West. I can just agree with you on both.
well, I invite you to try the others on the list... if you want to numb your brain more than you thought possible try Freeway, Footloose and Practical Witchcraft and if you add Battlefield Earth and watch those four in one session, I guarantee a deep coma
OK, if I ever feel the urge... :)
Uncanny list. I go back and forth as to whether I think Battlefield Earth or Godzilla is the worst movie I've ever seen. Fortunately I've never seen The Astronaut's Wife...
Johnny Waco
I think Godzilla barely edges Battlefield Earth because Godzilla was done with a cynical greedy box-office agenda in mind... at least Travolta blew part of his own money trying to make a movie based on his and fellow scientologists' *ahem* "beliefs"... Battlefield had some kind of propaganda goal, no matter how off-target that turned out to be... or maybe it couldn't have turned out any other way because of the message it tried to convey being so warped and uninteresting for "non-believers" to begin with... I have not seen Passion of the Christ but it seems obvious the movie gathered such a big worldwide response because Christianism really is a valid historical religion, not the creation of some sci-fi writer turned cult leader... but again, that's only my analysis and I'm sure other people could strongly disagree with it... Anyway, Godzilla is in that aspect of being a purely commercial money-driven piece of $h*t, worse than Battlefield Earth... though now I think of it, the "religion" to which Battlefield is connected also is ruled by greed and driven by money... aw, shucks!!
Maybe I should point out that this list is not ranked, it's only alphabetical...