2006: A Year of Reviews

Submitted by djinjekted on Sat, 12/31/2005 - 03:04
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  1. The following list contains every movie that I watch in 2006, along with reviews of each. Each movie is rated on a scale of 1-5, 1 being sucked ass and 5 being totally amazing.

  3. 01/02: Fun With Dick & Jane (5 stars) - I think I started 2006 off with a pretty good movie choice. It was good to see Jim Carrey back to his old goofy self, after playing around in some serious movies over the past few years (ie. The Truman Show and Eternal Sunshine...). None of the jokes fell short, and I walked out of the movie still laughing.
  4. 01/02: Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle (3 Stars) - This movie is pretty funny while you're watching it, but tomorrow, I'll have forgotten most of the funny lines. However, with this movie, a re-watch wouldn't be a bad thing. A few points I won't be forgetting... "NPH wouldn't do that","Let's get a f**king Mountain Dew!!", and NPH snorting a line of coke off a girl's ass. Parts I will forget... yeah, they escape me...
  5. 01/04: The Exorcism of Emily Rose (3 Stars) - I heard a lot of hype about this movie, and when I hear hype, I tend to expect big things out of movies. Luckily for me, I didn't out of this one for some reason. I enjoyed this movie, but I just kept waiting for something really exciting to happen.... and then the credits started rolling. I mean... at the end of the movie, I didn't feel like there was ever a climax. See this movie if you want to see something different or a good story, but don't expect to get done thinking "Holy shit, that was scary" or "Wow... I never saw that coming."
  6. 01/05: Secret Window (4 Stars) - I love Johnny Depp movies. He's such a good actor because he can play any character, from a cocky pirate, a screwed up chocolate maker, or... in this case... a soon-to-be divorced writer dealing with a stalker that thinks Depp stole his story. Secret Window is based on a Stephen King story, so I knew going into it that it was going to be sort of messed up. The movie was well done, the acting was great, and it kept you thinking... but the only drawback was that the ending was kind of predictable. Don't get me wrong, there were times when I had other ideas about what was happening, but all in all, I saw it coming. Nonetheless... it was a great movie, and I would definitely not mind owning a copy.
  7. 01/06: Bad News Bears (2005) (4 Stars) - I'm going to be completely honest... I've never seen the original of this movie, so this review is completely un-biased. I really liked this movie. Billy Bob Thornton does an excellent job (as always) as the scrubby, asshole guy. This definitely wasn't a family movie, but I sure got a good laugh out of the jokes... then again, my humor is pretty out there. My favorite line of the movie... "Hell no... I'm a goddamn paraplegic!"
  8. 01/07: The Ringer (4 Stars) - I just want to set the record straight to a bunch of people. This movie is NOT about making fun of mentally and physically challenged people. The only person being made fun of in this movie is Johnny Knoxville, and even HE isn't really even made fun of. What the movie shows is Knoxville's motivation to rig the Special Olympics, which, by the way, is to help out his immigrant worker who needs surgery). You see the hard work that goes into the Special Olympics, and the fun the athletes and volunteers have. The movie was definitely funny, yet didn't make you feel like an asshole for laughing at disabled people.
  9. 01/07: My Date With Drew (4 Stars) - This movie is about a man who has 30 days and $1,100 to get a date with Drew Barrymore. I don't know if this is considered a spoiler or not, but he doesn't get a date in his 30 day deadline. This is the kind of movie, however, that makes you want to stop watching half way through and actually go do something with your life. Hell, I'm eyeing my video camera right now trying to figure out what I can do for my big break.
  10. 01/07: Gremlins (4 Stars) - I love this movie because it's a classic. Going back and watching it for the first time in... who knows how many years was fun for the memories, but my technologically advanced mind kept catching flaws in the Gremlins movements. It's like being totally amazed with Jurassic Park, and then watching the 1933 version of King Kong. For it's time, the Gremlins "special effects" were great. I loved this movie as a kid, and still love this movie.
  11. 01/07: Wedding Crashers (5 stars) - There are a few actors that can make me laugh my ass off... Jim Carrey, Vince Vaughn, Owen Wilson, and Jason Lee. Two of them were in this movie. I loved this movie. I mean, it was a bit predictable, but at the same time, so much random stuff just happened that it kept me on the edge of my seat. It's that "silly" humor that just makes me die laughing every time!
  12. 01/08: Hostel (4 stars) - This is by far one of the most f**ked up movies I've ever seen (right behind Faces of Death). There's boobies, blood, death, violence, and little bastard kids that steal your bubble gum. Basically, the story is these 3 guys backpacking across Europe end up at this hostel, which lands them in bed with some hot chicks. However, their joy (and erections) are quickly lost when they are kidnapped and tortured. I happened to like the movie, even with the disgusting stuff in it.
  13. 01/10: Racing Stripes (2 stars) - Mom... you are wrong. This movie sucked. Ok... they made the animals look like they were talking. But the story wasn't that good... and the flies bit the horse at the end of the movie, which is the only reason the Zebra won. (It's not a spoiler... you knew it was bound to happen...) So the movie teaches kids that it's ok to cheat to win. Bad, stupid movie.
  14. 01/11: The Island (3 stars) - The movie is set in the future... and is about clones who are used as parts for their human counterparts in the real world. The movie was pretty good, the action was good, Scarlett was VERY good, but a bunch of stuff really annoyed me. The product placement is insane in this movie. Maybe I just noticed it more in this movie than in others, but it really distracted me. Also... where the hell are the black people? There are only two black clones... is the director saying that black people can't afford to have clones made? Finaly...(I know this is totally random and weird, but)...the music was awesome. I think the music in this movie really did a great job of capturing the emotion.
  15. 01/12: Hustle & Flow (5 stars) - This movie, contrary to popular belief, is not about running and menstruation. It IS about a pimp-turn-rapper and his struggles to break into the music business. This movie... was AWESOME. It was funny, yet serious, and you get to see a guy's dream come to life (and no... it's not to be in a heist or to own a monkey). Definitely watch this movie!
  16. 01/14: Vibrations (3 stars) - I remember this movie from when I was a kid and thought it was the coolest thing ever because I was a musician. Basic low down... the musician loses his hands and then gets electronic hands so he can play. Vibrations was made in 1995, but totally has the feel of an 80s movie. Actually, the movie really sucks. But I like it just because I'm a musician.
  17. 01/14: The Transporter 2 (2 stars) - I really liked the first Transporter, but like many sequels, this sucked. The story itself was fine, but the effects and acting was just over the top. The entire movie was just unbelievable. Booo.
  18. 01/18: Strange Brew (2 stars) - This movie was suggested by a friend. MaybeI didn't like this because I am sick and was falling asleep through the whole thing (and totally missed the last 30 minutes), or maybe it was just too... "strange". I might have to give this a rewatch in the future, with someone who like it.
  19. 01/18: The Cave (2 stars) - I know this is a sci-fi movie, and maybe that's not my thing. I think the movie would have been 100x better if it weren't for the big ass monsters that looked totally fake. I'd rather just watch a movie about people getting trapped in a cave and getting sick from mold, or something like that. I'd actually rather watch a movie about people staring at the opening of a cave for an hour and a half.
  20. 01/18: The Man (4 stars) - This was pretty funny. It had a fairly predictable story line, but Eugene Levy is funny as always. And Samuel L. Jackson is a bad ass as always. Not much to say, but I like it.
  21. 01/19: Blow (4 stars) - I owned this movie, but had never seen it before. I love Johnny Depp, and will gladly buy any movie of his. This movie, unsurprisingly, was great. It tells the story of George Jung, the drug dealer. Definitely a good watch...
  22. 01/19: Baby: Secret of the Lost Legend (4 stars) - This movie is a classic watch for me. I haven't seen this in at least 10 years, and it's still as good as I remembered. This is right up there with The Gods Must Be Crazy (which I still need to buy!) and Flight Of The Navigator... it's one of my favorite movies of my childhood.
  23. 01/19: The Truman Show (5 stars) - I love this movie for a few reasons. 1. When I was a kid, I imagined my entire life was a movie. 2. Jim Carrey is awesome. So funny, yet so serious in this movie. 3. This movie totally captured the "reality tv" genre before the genre even existed. This is by far one of my favorite movies of all time.
  24. 01/20: Lord of War (4 stars) - Nicolas Cage plays a weapons dealer for warlords (or lords of war). I have to say, this movie isn't for veryone. Although it has it's funny parts, it is definitely a very twisted, disturbing movie. I got it mostly because I like Nicolas Cage, but ended up finding a movie that I really enjoyed and definitely will be putting on my "Want To Own" list.
  25. 01/21: The Gospel (2 stars) - I initially got this because I think gospel music is pretty cool. What I got out of the movie was about 30 minutes of good music, and about an hour and half of boring. When a rapper returns home, he needs to save his father's church, so he hosts a fundraising revival. I, on the other hand, need to host a fundraising revival for my wallet. :(
  26. 01/22: Bubble Boy (3 stars) - A silly movie about a boy that grows up in a bubble because he has no immunities. It's one of those movies that you see once, and probably won't ever watch again, unless it happens to be on tv and you have no life... which I don't, as you can see based on the list of movies above.
  27. 01/22: The Pianist (4 stars) - I knew going into this movie that it was about the Holocaust... so I was expecting violence and... well, lots of death. However, this movie focuses on a musician who goes into hiding, and survives the destruction of nearly his entire race (Jews, obviously) against all odds. The movie is really sad, but very educational.
  28. 01/23: Next Stop, Greenwich Village (2 stars) - Sometimes I wonder why Netflix recommends movies to me. This is one of those times. The movie had some funny parts, but not enough to make me LOL or ROFL. It was more of a HEHE... not even a HAHA. *sigh*
  29. 01/24: The Aristocrats (3 stars) - 100 comedians, 1 joke, and a crap load of nasty, filthy, dirty language. It's great. The only problem... it was too long for "one punchline".
  30. 01/24: Thumbsucker (3 stars) - A 17 year old kid sucks his thumb. Unfortunately, he just sucks in general. This movie... was decent. I love independent movies. Keanu Reeves was awesome, as was Vince Vaughn. It's not a movie I'd want to own, or watch over and over. It wasn't the "Garden State" or "Napoleon Dynamite" I was expecting. It's good at what it set out to do... but entertaining me 100% wasn't on their agenda.
  31. 01/27: The Fog (2005) (2 stars) - This is a horror movie with [insert generic hot girl name here] and [insert another generic hot girl name here]. Of course there are guys in it, but whatever. They are all terrorized by [insert generic scary thing here], which is supposed to be scary, but isn't. [insert two thumbs down here]
  32. 01/27: A Dirty Shame (3 stars) - The MPAA told the creators of this movie that in order to make it rated R, they'd have to cut so much out of the film, it'd only be 10 minutes long. That sums up this movie. It's funny, but raunchy.
  33. 01/28: A Bug's Life (5 stars) - This is by far my favorite Pixar movie. I could watch this movie multiple times a week. And being the first movie put on dvd directly from the digital source, the quality of the image and sound are great.
  34. 01/29: A Cool, Dry Place (4 stars) - Vince Vaughn in an earlier movie (1998) that surprisingly... isn't that funny. The cool thing is... you can totally see his style evolving in this film, in the way he acts with his son. It's a great Sunday afternoon movie, that I wouldn't mind watching again.
  35. 01/30: Grumpy Old Men (4 stars) - Again, this is a movie that never gets old. I mean, seriously... this totally reminds me of how I imagine my best friend and I in 60 years. The thing I love is that even after years of "fighting", they still care about each other. Great movie! Definitely glad I own this one
  36. 01/31: Shrek (5 stars) - I love this movie because it's a great mix of awesome computer animation, great story, and a slight bit of adult humor. If you asked me which I liked better... this or A Bug's Life... I would probably die before deciding.
  37. 01/31: Corpse Bride (4 stars) - Tim Burton pulls it off again. Another great movie, with great music, great visuals, and a great story. I went into this really thinking it was going to be another "Nightmare Before Christmas." However, he did a great job of keeping the stories really separate, but you can definitely see the influence.
  38. 02/01: Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (5 stars) - Johnny Depp is amazing in this movie. I love him as an actor, because he's so versatile. He can play any kind of character, like a drug dealer, a pirate, or... a candy maker. His sarcasm cracks me up so much. This movie is much more visual than the original, but that's most likely due to technology. Plus... Tim Burton has a crazy imagination. The music is amazing. Basically, this entire movie is amazing.
  39. 02/08: Waiting... (4 stars) - Having worked in a restaurant, I loved this movie. The type of people working there are insane, just like the workers in the movie; and the customers... man, they're just crazy. I related to nearly everything in this movie, except I never had to experience "full frontal male nudity." I got this from Netflix, but it's definitely going on the "need to buy" list.
  40. 02/10: Serenity (2 stars) - I think that I didn't pay close enough attention to this movie, because I had a hard time following what was going on. Maybe the hard core Firefly fans love this movie... but I just don't think it was for me.
  41. 02/12: Haggard (5 stars) - Fans of CKY and Viva la Bam will love this movie by Bam Margera. It has all the elements of CKY, but with a storyline and better filmed. One of my favorite movies in my collection.
  42. 02/15: Go (5 stars) - One of my favorite movies of all time. I've always meant to count how many times they say, "Go" in this movie, but I always lose track. If anyone knows... tell me!
  43. 02/16: Chances Are (4 stars) - This is a really good movie about a guy that gets married, then dies, and is reborn. Then he runs somehow meets his wife's daughter (his daughter from his previous life) and then begins having flashbacks about his old life. It was suggested to me by a friend of mine that said she enjoyed this movie as a kid. I enjoyed this movie as an adult. So there we go.
  44. 02/17: Date Movie (3 stars) - Watch the trailer... did you like it? If you did, you'll give this movie 3 stars. If you didn't, don't waste your time or money.
  45. 02/19: William Shakespeare's Romeo + Juliet (1996) (3 stars) - For some reason, I've been thinking about this movie a lot lately. So I broke down and bought it. I had forgotten that they use the actual Shakespearean lines. It was good, but not one of those movies that I would watch over and over and over.
  46. 02/20: The Family Man (5 stars) - I love this movie. I always wish that I can have "glimpses" into how my life would be if I had done things differently. Jack (Nicolas Cage) gets just that in this movie... and the glimpse totally changes his life.
  47. 02/21: Rent (4 stars) - I hate musicals. How the hell do people random people all know the same song and dances? It's almost like... life is rehearsed. With that said, I love this movie.... and I wish I could see the actual Broadway show. And now to admit something I don't want most of my guy friends seeing... I cried. It's true.
  48. 02/22: Zathura (3 stars) - Did you like Jumanji? Then you'll love this movie. It's basically Jumanji 2, except.. in space, not with animals. Except those sheep... with 6 eyes. It wasn't a bad movie... I just wouldn't ever watch it again.
  49. 02/23: The Skeleton Key (1 star) - The only thing I can say is... WTF?! I can't believe people actually get funding to make movies like this.
  50. 02/23: Unleashed (4 stars) - Jet Li is raised and trained as an animal... fighting to earn his master money, and even going as far as wearing a collar. When his master dies, Danny (Li) is taken in by Morgan Freeman... but knows nothing of the outside world. I thought this was a great movie, and I would definitely watch it again sometime, and definitely suggest that other people watch it.
  51. 02/24: Anchorman (5 stars) - I love this movie and watch it often. So funny! I'm not even going to write a lot because it would take too long... but, I will say... "you eat the cat poop!"
  52. 02/24: Rent (4 stars) - Yeah yeah, I watched it again. Maybe I'm starting to like musicals. Who knows?
192201/30/2006

Good reviews. Also good that Gremlins gets some credit.

djinjekted01/31/2006

Thanks! I like to give the "normal person's" perspective on movies. I hate when critics discuss the "tone" and "themes" of movies. I don't get it.... was it a good movie? Great, thanks.

pmcollector01/31/2006

I don't know about the original Gremlins, but Gremlins 2 just rocked my world.

djinjekted01/31/2006

I should re-watch that. I haven't seen it in years!