Under Odysseus
Submitted by jim on Thu, 03/09/2006 - 10:36
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Under Odysseus, a soldier's blog:
I guess that the Trojans might bring something like that inside. I don't know. I still feel pretty drunk. Still, anything that could put an end to this war sounds good to me.
I can't stop reading it.
I am going to punch Eurylochus in the fucking mouth, that little piece of shit. That's what you get for being nice and promoting a coward. Nobody talks about me behind my back, by Zeus! Nobody!
What the Hades does he have against Elepnor? the poor kid. It's his first time away from home and all he wants to do is get drunk and make "burnt offerings" to Dionysus. All the way over he'd say, "Let's go up on deck and break out an amphora."
It used to be cute. But now, whenever we sack a city I'll find him up on some high roof, stumbling down drunk and crying about some nymph who turned him down when he asked her to the prom. The Myrmidons are considering staging an intervention but I say let the kid enjoy himself. I think he's got a boyfriend three tents over he's been seeing pretty regular.
Personally, I'm against the War. Helen's flat-chested.
If Eurylochus thinks he's going to get up Athena's skirts he's got another thing coming. I'll make him do Philoctes's laundry. By Pallas Athena I will! That bastard has a stick up his butt the size of Ajax's spear. Let's see him be wiley all day. It's not as easy as it looks, self-serving little schmuck. And just try sacking a city, let alone a dozen. Those cities don't just sack themselves, you know. It takes some planning, you jerk.
If he makes it back to Ithaca alive I'll eat my cloak.
:-) Poor sap probably couldn't have imagined you'd actually stumble across his journal. As if war weren't hadesish enough.