blindsider's assorted lame jokes
Submitted by blindsider on Mon, 06/22/2009 - 13:31
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- Q:How can you tell when an elephant's getting ready to charge?
- A:He asks if you accept Visa
- Q:What was Beethoven's favourite fruit?
- A:Ba-na-na-naaa!(it's funnier when you say it out loud)
- Q:What's Beethoven doing right now?
- A:De-composing
- Q:If you spin an Asian man in circles, does he get dis-oriented?
- Q:Where do Generals keep their armies?
- A:In their sleevies
- Q:What's big, green, and eats pie?
- A:A big green pie-eater
- A skeleton goes up to the bartender and says 'I'd like a beer and a mop'
- Two peanuts were walking down the alley late one night, and one of them was a-salted
- Q:Why did the chicken cross the road?
- A:To get to the other side
- Q:Why did the skeleton cross the road?
- A:To show people that he had guts
- Q:What do you call a guy that never farts in public?
- A:A private tutor
- Q:Why does ET have such big eyes?
- A:He saw his phone bill
- Q:How do you change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb?
- A:Hey! That joke's offensive to me. I happen to be dylexiacs myself
- Q:Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?
- A:He was looking for Pooh
- Q:Why don't anteaters ever get sick?
- A:They're full of anty-bodies
- Q:What do you call a guy that lies on the floor?
- A:Matt
- Q:What do you call a guy that floats?
- A:Bob
- Q:What do you call a guy that hides in the bushes when it's windy?
- A:Russell
- Q:What's brown and sticky?
- A:A stick
In retrospect, all of these jokes were pretty lame, but they were hilarious at the time I heard them. Tell some of them to your friends, and hope that they laugh(otherwise they will probably think you're lame as well)
If you have any lame jokes to share, please do